It's the Bloggity!: Death Makes Me Go TOOOOOOOO Deep

So today, in my English class, our class discussed what we thought was the best way to live and the best way to die as an introduction to a new unit and my teacher said something that got me thinking. He said when he dies, he doesn't care if anyone remembers him or not and most of the class disagreed with him. Now, I was on the fence, seeing as how I studying Buddhism in hopes of becoming a Buddhist in the near future.

Buddha say that we should except death in our life. Once we do this and except all the other negatives and positives in life then we will find complete happiness. In finding complete happiness, you must realize that this world is not permanent and nothing is forever here. 


Part of me believes what Buddha says is true, I do need to except death even though I'm extremely afraid of it but I don't want to detach myself from this world to a point where nobody's going to remember me. I don't necessarily want to have millions and millions of adoring fans but I do want my friends and family to remember me for all the good times we had together and not remember me just sitting in a mountain in China for my entire life.


It's a coincidence that this topic was brought up to me today because last year today my grandfather died of liver cancer. I didn't know him that well but I respect him because he knew he would die yet he never told anyone and the doctors found out too late before they could save him but  I don't know if I should miss him and hold on to the brief memories we shared or move on but I don't want to forget about him because when you forget about someone, it's like you forgot about their whole purpose in life. I think if you forget about someone then their was no point of them living in the first place.


But I guess that's what you have to figure out in life though but it's scary just thinking that I won't be able to fulfill all the goals I had set for myself. I'm an atheist, so I don't believe in an after life and at times, I don't believe in souls. I believe the "soul" is just your mind, your conscience, the person you are inside and this person is controlled by the brain. Once you die your brain stops working so in a way, your "soul" dies with your body to me. Now, I'm do trying to bash any religion or anything because who knows, I can change, and maybe one day I'll be Christian or a Muslim or Agnostic but right now I just don't know. I'm often think to much and maybe that's the reason for my Atheism and I feel like we all don't know. A Christian doesn't know their god is there, they believe and have faith that he is there and that's what we all will have to do, believe and have faith that one day, we will find the real answer to why we are here and what we are here for but until then I'll just be waiting, wondering, and hoping for the answer to come . . . 










For my grandpa:
R.I.P. Grandpa Terry (1951~2009)